Aregica:“When imagination becomes the only fact”
Welcome to Aregica News Room Channel!! Transmission 172’ Middle East through TeenStuff Sat!
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Ladies and Gentlemen! Good afternoon, we’d like to assure you that the following news isn’t one of our April’s fools, but extremely true!!
1) Aregica 2110
Finally, Aregica has won the honor of organizing the world cup 2110. Due the great effort which are exerted. Aregica became the most suitable country for hosting such an event. Stadiums were built on international quality basis. Sports are now one of the very essential needs in the daily routine of any Aregica citizen.
People’s daily behavior changed a lot. People with different social levels, were taught how to do their works as well as they could. On the other hand, the Aregican government worked hard to offer their citizens a good standard of living and give the employees suitable salaries and eliminate the word (Ma7dood el Da7’l) from the Aregican dictionary. Consequently, bribers no longer exist because employees have higher self consciousness and are loyal to the country that respecting their needs and necessities. Children at school are taught how to their country, not only because of its great past civilization, but also because of its bright present and promising future. It’s worth mentioning that all these radical changes took one hundred years only to take place!!!
Now available in the markets!! The new washing machine (El Sha3noona)! Capacity: 100kg, new stainless steel inner body; you can choose from fifty different colors! High speed: 5 hours/program. Motor speed: 2rpm. El Sha3noona makes tasks other than washing. It wakens your husband up with its very tunable sound and chases both cats your children, El Sha3noona does it for you. It can remove the colors of your children’s clothes in less than a second. Don’t hesitate; El Sha3noona is the solution for all your problems. Great offer: Buy El Sha3noona for only fifty thousand Aregican pounds! Call us now!
2) Water Drought in Rasn City
Unfortunately, Rasn City; one of the cities in eastern Aregica, spent one of the worst weeks ever. People there suffered from drought for more than six days without any respect for humanity. One of our trusted sources informed us that it was one of the plans of the “Water Importance” Campaign, aimed at teaching how important water is. This plan was carried out parallel with the increase in the price of water supplies. On the other hand, we knew that one of the foreign flights refused to take its water supplies for the journey from Aregica because it was believed that Aregica’s water is contaminated and not suitable for human use. Nevertheless, a responsible source in the Aregica Ministry of health denied the large percentage of patients with nephritic disease to genetic factors.
Now available in the markets!! The new washing machine (El Sha3noona)! Capacity: 100kg, new stainless steel inner body, you can choose from fifty different colors! High speed: 5 hours/program. Motor speed: 2rpm. If you buy it now, you’ll get 10 boxes of chocolates and 50 bottles of ketchup!! Don’t miss the great offer, we send it right to your door for free! El Sha3noona with the 10 boxes of chocolate and 50 bottles of ketchup with only fifty thousand Aregica pounds. Call us now on: 911 and enjoy the offer!
3) New System for ASE
Yesterday, the Aregica Ministry of Education was discussing a new system for ASE “Aregica Secondary Education”. The new system provides a number of new subjects which the students; who are supposed to have completed their preparatory stage, know nothing about the differences between these new subjects. The system is aimed to attract students to attend their classes at schools instead of private lessons. On the contrary, the new system is predicted to be the cause of the stagnancy of the market in the coming months. This is because more than two billions pounds are spent every year on private lessons. Another disadvantage of the system is that streets, as well as all means of transportations, will be very crowded in the morning because both students and teachers are supposed to go to their schools daily. Providing a solution for the first problem, Aregican Ministry of Economics is now accepting applications of graduates commerce, economics and business administration graduates to provide them with new job opportunities. Those graduates will be giving private lessons in management, finance and economics for ASE students and thus refreshing the market. Finally, we wish Aregica could find a solution for all other disadvantages of the new system.
At the end of this episode of Aregica’s news room, we wish you a Happy April’s Fool. By the way, we advise you not to buy El Sha3noona. It’s all an advertisement fool! See you next episode!
Noha Samara, 20
Illustration by: Adnan Hesham